It Takes What It Takes

Welcome to Chapter #1 called “It Takes Neutral Thinking.”

Quick context: Russell Wilson is the quarterback of the Seattle Seahawks. Until recently, he was the highest-paid NFL player in history. He’s also one of Trevor’s clients and the two of them created a business together called Limitless Minds. He wrote the foreword to the book and is a case study Trevor comes back to throughout the book.

In this scene, Trevor tells us about a playoff game in which “Russell played one of the worst fifty-five minutes of his young football career.” He had thrown FOUR interceptions and they were losing badly.

He kept his thinking “neutral”—embracing the reality of the situation while focusing on what needed to get done.

Now, it’s obvious to see that he wasn’t negative and drowning in his failures.

What’s less obvious to see is that he wasn’t thinking POSITIVELY per se either. The reality is that there wasn’t a lot to be “positive” about and if he pretended that all was awesome he would have sounded inauthentic and would have been less effective.

He simply looked at the clock, did the math and got to work on the next most important task.

That’s NEUTRAL thinking. Try it. It works.

P.S. As I was reading the book, I took a break and explained this idea to Emerson. Here’s the example I used: Our chickens. And their poop.

Quick context: We just moved to the country. We got some chickens because we thought they’d be awesome. They are. The kids love them, etc. And… Those guys sure know how to poop and they especially love to do it under our beautiful patio where I often meditate as the sun’s rising. Let’s just say that the meditation scene is less idyllic when the chicken poop is wafting up. lol

The “negative” thinking goes something like this: “Those chickens are a pain and trying to corral their poop is also a pain. I think we might want to find them a new home.” (lol) The “positive” thinking would go something like this: “It’s not so bad and the chickens are so great.”

Neither of those is as effective as NEUTRAL thinking: The chickens are pooping under the patio and stinking up our place. The kids love them but we need a better solution. So, let’s limit their access to that location and figure out a poop control protocol. Next step: Order some chicken wire for the bottom of the patio and install it.”

<- Boom. Done. Emerson got it immediately. And, he still has his chickens. :)

P.P.S. The morning after that chat we were doing our family workout—I run around the 1/2-mile Trail we created around our property and the kids ride their bikes as I chase them. Emerson’s bike had a flat tire. He immediately started crying.

I cruised over and said, “Buddy! Your tire’s flat. That’s a bummer. I get it. Now… Remember neutral thinking? WHAT DO YOU WANT?”

He said, “To ride my bike.” I said, “Exactly. So what can we do to make that happen?” He said, “Get the bike pump and fill up the tire.” I said, “Exactly.” <- Boom. Done.

That’s NEUTRAL thinking. Try it. It works.

Back to Trevor: “That’s neutral. Staying in the moment, giving each moment its own history, and reacting to events as they unfold. It takes away emotion and replaces it with behaviors. Instead of asking, ‘How do I feel?’ you should be asking yourself, ‘What do I do?’”

You can develop these skills if you’re willing to let go of a few things. Negative, cynical thinking doesn’t make you more realistic. It just makes you negative and cynical. Biased thinking doesn’t help you either. You need to steer clear of your feelings and make an honest assessment of each situation you face. Don’t worry about what you feel. Rely on what you know.”

Welcome to chapter #2: “It Takes a Plan.”

This time we get a backstage pass to what was going on in Russell Wilson’s mind before and after one of the biggest plays in Super Bowl history. It’s so big it has its own name: “The Play.”

For those who may not know, Russell won a Super Bowl in his second year. Then he led his Seahawks BACK to the Super Bowl the next year. That Super Bowl had THE (!!) largest television audience in American history watching it. The viewership peaked at 120.8 million people—which is one out of every three Americans in the country.

You know what they saw? Well, 120 million people watched Russell lead an epic comeback against the Patriots and then… throw an interception at the goal line with time expiring. :/

You know what Russell did? He pulled himself together, conducted himself with poise in the post-game interview then (goosebumps) GOT TO WORK TO GET BETTER—hitting his offseason with a ferocity to alchemize that into something positive.

How’d he do that? Well, the neutral thinking certainly helped. So did the fact (!) that he KNOWS that you can’t have a shot at greatness without risking failure.

As Trevor puts it a few pages later:“That was the mental part. Owning it. He’d held the trophy the year before. He’d shoulder the other side of it now. Derek Jeter—Russell’s favorite athlete—said what Russell was now living: to be able to hit the game-winning home run, you have to be willing to strike out in the same batter’s box. That translates to football pretty easily. To have a chance to throw the touchdown pass that wins the Super Bowl, you have to be willing to throw the interception that loses the Super Bowl. Those two things live in the same moment.”

You know who else that sounds like? Mr. Hero’s Journey: Joseph Campbell.

In Pathways to Bliss, he tells us: “The hero journey is one of the universal patterns through which that radiance shows brightly. What I think is that a good life is one hero journey after another. Over and over again, you are called to the realm of adventure, you are called to new horizons. Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There’s always the possibility of a fiasco. But there’s also the possibility of bliss.”

Remember: Want to hit the game winning home run? You need to be willing to strike out in that same batter’s box. Let’s step out of the warm-up circle and into the arena. Our destiny is calling.

P.S. There are 12 chapters in the book. Each features an “It Takes…” Here’s what it takes:

1. It Takes Neutral Thinking (Positive? Negative? Nah. NEUTRAL is where it’s at.)

2. It Takes a Plan (What’s yours?)

3. It Takes Hard Choices (Ultimately, if you’re committed to greatness, there IS no choice.See “The Illusion of Choice.”)

4. It Takes a Verbal Governor (Quit saying stupid things out loud. :)

5. It Takes a Negativity Diet (Your environment STRONGLY influences your well-being. Eliminate as much negative stuff as you can—goodbye incessant news, country songs, etc. :)

6. It Takes an Ad Campaign in Your Brain (You’re always talking to yourself so you might as well feed your brain a stream of positive branding ads, eh?)

7. It Takes Visualizing (What’s YOUR best future look like?)

8. It Takes Self-Awareness (What do you do that works? DO MORE OF THAT. What needs work? Work on it!)

9. It Takes Pressure (Pressure, ultimately, Trevor tells us via Billie Jean King, is a privilege. Why? Because feeling pressure means that what we’re doing matters.)

10. It Takes Leadership (And that starts with leading yourself first.)

11. It Takes Role Models (Who are your heroes? Trevor’s dad was his. You?)

12. It Takes What It Takes (You ready to do what needs to get done?)

The Law of Substitution. <- I love it.

My only question: Should we call it “The Law of Focus”? Either way, the fact is, our minds can only focus on ONE thing. So, the key to “blocking out” the external noise isn’t to try to “block out” the external noise. It’s to turn the volume up on your OWN focused thinking such that your mind doesn’t even notice the external distractions.

How do we do that? FOCUS. On what? On what’s important now. Unfortunately, most of us have destroyed our ability to truly, deeply, sustainably Focus by allowing our minds to bounce from input to input to input all day every day. We’d be wise to remember Ian Robertson’s wisdom that “A wandering mind is an unhappy mind.”

Trevor’s dad was one of the pioneers in the self-esteem/leadership movement. I smiled as I read stories about him and his dad—imagining what stories Emerson might share in the future. :)

Now, I loved the idea of neutral thinking. BUT… THIS idea might just be my favorite in the book.

The ILLUSION of Choice. We THINK we have an array of choices available to us. But… If we’re SERIOUS about actualizing our potential, achieving greatness, winning our own version of the Super Bowl then there simply IS NO CHOICE. Moment to moment to moment we need to step forward into growth and give our best. PERIOD.

Trevor tells us:“Making bad choices is the lifeblood of average. It feeds it. It consumes it. It protects it. Choice is a competitor—as much as any tangible opponent you or any team will face. In fact, it’s the ultimate competitor. It taunts you. It will lie to you. Take choice out of your way, and it’s like pulling the fitness band off Usain Bolt. The Velcro snaps, and watch his ass disappear. Choice is an illusion. Choice is Keyser Freaking Söze.

This may sound crazy, especially in an age where many people are bombarded by options. The music we listen to. The shows we watch. The time we wake up. The food we eat. The people we associate with. The way we prepare. The effort we give. The effort we don’t give. But do we have the luxury of choice if excellence is what we aspire to?”

Right below that passage I wrote: Paradox of Choice. The Freak Factor. GSP: Sacrifices vs. Decisions. Chasing Excellence.

In our VERY last Note on The Freak Factor we hit on the EXACT same theme. We THINK choice is awesome. But, ultimately it’s NOT. ESPECIALLY when we decide to go for excellence.

When you get up? When you go to sleep? How you train? How you show up in your Work and your Love? When we’re all in, there is no choice. So, let’s drop the illusion and make the ultimate decision that makes all the little decisions for us. Let’s go for greatness. TODAY.

That’s from the final chapter “It Takes What It Takes” in which we sum it all up.

As I read that, I thought of all the other SEAL books we’ve featured—most recently Fearless. When I was online next, I ordered the book. Note coming soon.

I also thought of another neutral-thinking gritty exemplar: Joe De Sena. In Spartan Up!, he gives us some parallel wisdom via a similar metaphor: “The way to get through anything mentally painful is to take it a little at a time. The mind can’t handle dealing with a massive iceberg of pain in front of it, but it can deal with short nuggets that will come to an end. So instead of thinking, Ugh, I’ve got twenty-four miles to go, focus on making it to the next telephone pole in the distance. Whether you’re running twenty or one hundred and twenty miles at a time, the distance has to be tackled mentally and physically one mile at a time. The ability to compartmentalize pain into these small bite sizes is key.”

So… Want to gain control of your life? Know that It Takes What It Takes. Start thinking neutrally, let go of the illusion of choice, practice the Law of Substitution and step into the arena of your most heroic life.

Let’s have the Wisdom to know the game we’re playing and how to play it well. And the Self-Mastery to play it well RIGHT NOW.

Let’s ask ourselves the question, “Now what needs to be done?” And then go do it. In other words: Let’s draw a line in the dirt and get to it. Then draw another one. And keep going. TODAY.