“As we observed each other at work, discussed our failures and successes, conferred about difficult cases, and disclosed our own hang-ups, we realized that people with very different problems seemed to be making the same basic mistakes over and over again. This led us to test a variety of different methods for overcoming in a short time the common mistakes that produce so much unhappiness. Our conclusions have led us to write this book. …
But being aware of the various mistakes that create havoc is insufficient. We have to do something about them. Straightforward, deliberate, and systematic rethinking is the first step toward a constructive change in our feelings and emotions. But even rethinking is not enough. In addition, we have to act differently, we have to change our behaviors, if we really wish to change our lives.”
~ Arnold Lazarus & Allen Fay from I Can If I Want To
This is a fantastic, old school psychology classic.
Written in 1975, Albert Ellis (see Notes on A Guide to Rational Living) says it’s “One of the best self help books ever written.”
Arnold Lazarus and Allen Fay (a leading psychologist + psychiatrist, respectively) walk us through 20 of the most common mistakes that can ruin our lives and, of course, how to correct them. It’s a quick-reading, straight-to-the-point 115-page book focused on helping us change our lives NOW by identifying our destructive thoughts and behaviors that are getting in the way.
It’s packed with Big Ideas. (Get a copy here.)
I’m excited to share a handful of my favorites so let’s jump straight in!
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