In our last several +1s, we’ve been exploring some powerful wisdom from Darrin Donnelly’s Victory Favors the Fearless.
Today we’re going to wrap up our tour by talking about the difference between confidence and arrogance.
Let’s get straight to work.
Quick context.
As I mentioned, this book is a sports fable. It features a boxer who goes from down and out to heavyweight champion after he meets the perfect mentor who teaches him how to conquer the seven fears that hold us back.
His mentor’s name is Andre.
Here they are having a little chat:
“‘Are you sure all this talk about self-confidence won’t backfire?’ I asked. ‘Are you sure I won’t become too confident and do something stupid?’
Andre laughed. ‘There’s really no such thing as being too confident. Too arrogant, yes. But not too confident. There’s a difference.'
'Confidence is the belief that you have what it takes to overcome any challenge that comes your way. Arrogance is the belief that you’re so wonderful nothing will be a challenge for you. We’ve talked about this before. Arrogant people get exposed quickly and they back down in the face of adversity. Confident people step up in the face of adversity because they know they can. See the difference?'
'I do,’ I said. 'You’re saying arrogant people don’t prepare themselves for the challenges they’re about to face. Confident people expect challenges, and then expect to overcome them.’
‘You got it.’”
Cue choir of angels. 👼 👼👼
Confidence vs. Arrogance.
There’s a big difference between the two and I LOVE how Darrin breaks it down.
As we discuss ALL THE TIME (!), the word confidence comes from the Latin word confidere.
It literally means “to have intense trust.”
Intense trust in WHAT?
That things will go perfectly?
No.
That, of course, is absurd.
Intense trust in the fact that it doesn’t matter what happens because YOU have intense trust in YOURSELF to respond powerfully to *whatever* life throws at you.
How do we develop THAT kind of intense trust?
There’s only ONE way to do it.
It’s the same way you build trust in ANY relationship.
We need to do what we say we will do.
Not once in a while and/or when we *feel* like it, but more and more consistently, all day, every day, ESPECIALLY when we don’t (insert that whiney voice again!) *feel* like it.
The arrogant person thinks they don’t need to work hard any more.
They’ve made it. They’re exonerated from future challenges.
We must know that that person is WEAK not strong.
The truly confident Hero KNOWS that they will never be exonerated from pain, uncertainty and hard work.
We have the humility to know that TODAY is the day to get better so we have the strength for two.
We ask: “Am I giving my best? Am I becoming the best that I can be?”
Here’s to conquering our fear and giving our absolute best to the world.
Not someday.
TODAY.
Day 1. All in.
LET’S GO, HERO!
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